


Make it right

by Sashaya



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Fix-it fic, Gen, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, I can't write without it being Steter, I had to mention Erica and Boyd, I hate tags, Magic!Stiles, Nemeton isn't evil, Stiles has magic!, Stiles is connected to Nemeton, a bit of angst, because I'm a masochist, but it's just an allusion?, but just for a bit, canon character death, watch out for Steter, you can ignore it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-03
Updated: 2014-04-03
Packaged: 2018-01-18 01:27:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,680
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1409920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sashaya/pseuds/Sashaya
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><i>It were Stiles’ hands and his orders. It was his voice and his cold smirk.</i><br/><i>It was his fault they all died.</i> </p><p>Stiles is haunted by what the Nogitsune did. He needs to make it right.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Make it right

**Author's Note:**

> Great thank you to my lovely beta, Nehelena. This time I was much more difficult and I'm happy she didn't give up.  
> Love you, Melda Heri!

It were Stiles’ hands and his orders. It was his voice and his cold smirk.

It was his fault they all died. 

“ _It wasn’t you Stiles_ ” someone’s voice whispers – Scott or Lydia? – but he doesn’t hear. He can only hear screams of all the people he killed. 

“ _You didn’t kill anyone_ ”

They didn’t know it before. But now Stiles knows. Feels it firsthand. When the Nogitsune died – or didn’t because he couldn’t be killed… - Stiles got back his health and life. And his memories. Memories of all that people dying before his eyes as he walks through the corridors like a king, dressed in blood. 

“ _It wasn’t you_ ”

But it was. And they don’t understand. And he can’t sleep again and his father knows something is wrong (again) because he watches Stiles like a hawk. That’s good because Stiles can’t promise he won’t pick up his gun and shoot himself between the eyes (to be sure). 

“ _It’s okay now”_

But it’s not! They’re still dead and he still killed them! It’s not okay. And never be.

 

Or maybe it will because he finds a way (that no-one will like). And he works alone. 

It’s going slow – too slow – but Stiles can’t go to Deaton. He would know and he would tell on him. Stiles can’t risk his redemption.

So he works slowly. And it takes him three months – three months of people asking him to let them in, let them help him. Three months of sleepless nights or nights ending with screams. Three months of his father dragging him to psychologist. Three months of Scott begging to let it go. Three months of Lydia’s orders and badly hidden pleas. Three months of Melissa’s careful words and gentle touches. Three months of Derek growling in the corner. Three months of Peter watching him silently like he _knows_. Three months of lack of Allison’s presence (and three months of Chris’ drinking and waiting for his life to end).

Stiles sometimes sits with Chris – he’s just there and he never says a thing (the days when he was the annoying chatter-box are long gone but Chris doesn’t notice). He sends Scott and Derek and Peter – because Peter _knows_ so he listens – to watch Chris. He makes sure Chris is still around (even if Chris hates him and it’s hell – and Stiles knows).  
It takes him three months and by the end, his blood sings with trees and his heart beats in the rhythm of Beacon Hills. Scott doesn’t understand, Peter looks at him and doesn’t say anything. Stiles doesn’t know why and he doesn’t ask. It’s better like this.

Derek almost drags him to Deaton. Stiles doesn’t let him. Derek doesn’t fight – just disappear in the night and doesn’t come back. Stiles takes it as a silent blessing and doesn’t care (it hurts just a little).

It takes him three months but he’s ready. He will get his redemption (and the voices won’t scream anymore). He does it for himself. He knows. But he also knows he wants it all to turn back. (He wants to cheer on Allie again as she shoots another creeper dead.)

It takes him three months but he is one with Nemeton and the Nemeton speaks in his mind (he hates it, hates having someone in his head but it’s just a soft lull and it calms the screams down – he can survive). Stiles doesn’t talk to the Nemeton but it knows and they struck a deal. Stiles just has to feed it and he does. The Nemeton is fair – never taking more than Stiles can give. It feels good and calm.

“Where are you going?” Sheriff’s voice comes through Nemeton’s whispers and Stiles blinks. He has his hand on the handle and a pack on his back. Sheriff is sitting on the couch and watching Stiles.

“I…” Stiles doesn’t remember. Sheriff narrows his eyes and Stiles can feel his worry and that wakes him up. “Sorry. I’m a bit out of it. I need to do something”

“Stiles” his dad stands up and walks to him. He looks like he wants to grab Stiles but decides against it. “What’s going on, son?”

“No-…” Stiles wants to lie. He wants to say something witty and him but he can’t. He remembers months of lying to his dad about werewolves and he remembers how that almost killed him. “I need to… make it right, dad”

“What? Stiles, don’t do anything stupid. I know you’ve been up to something and… Stiles, I miss you. I miss my son” John says and Stiles almost cracks. 

He does crack and he can feel tears welling up in his eyes and rolling down his cheeks. His dad reaches for him and hugs him. Stiles feels like it’s not him (again) and Nemeton doesn’t says anything. It backs away, letting Stiles decide. Letting him have his control. 

“Dad, I promise. No… Everything’s going to be fine. I just need to do this. I’m… I’m gonna be okay. I’m gonna be me again. Just let me” he speaks and his voice is thick with tears.  
He hopes his dad will let go and he hopes he won’t – he needs it all. 

“I’m going with you” John says suddenly.

“No” Stiles pushes away and out of his father’s arms. He wants the contact to last. But he needs to do this. “I have to be alone”

“Stiles…”

“No, dad. Listen” Stiles breathes deeply and feels like the nature beats in his chest. It calms him down. “There’s a ritual. It’s… it’s gonna help me. But I have to be alone. It needs balance and there can’t… there can’t be anyone else. I’m gonna be fine, I promise”

John’s jaw is set and he’s stiff. Stiles knows he doesn’t like it. But he hopes he won’t fight.

“I’ll drive you” he says and Stiles nods. 

“But promise me you’ll stay in the car” Stiles says before they leave. “If the ritual is disturb… I don’t know what will happen” Stiles knows – he will die because Nemeton will want too much – but he doesn’t want to say it.

John knows, judging by his fisted hands and aborted move to grab his gun. Stiles hates it.

“Let’s go” he says and Sheriff follows.

 

The place is dark and empty. Stiles feels the lack of any life here (like he feels the lack of Allie’s soft smile). The sky is hidden by clouds and it’s perfect. It’s a full moon – time of witches and werewolves. And his wolves are gone, draped over each other in the den (and they cry - Stiles can feel them howl). He feels his father in the car and he feels his worry (and anger – Stiles wishes it’s not because of him but he’s not a fool. Not anymore). 

Nemeton is loud in his head but it lets him think. It doesn’t want to take over him – and Stiles knows it because he can feel it like it can feel him. He can manipulate it like it can use him. They’re equals in this and it calms Stiles down.

Stiles makes the circle automatically. It’s perfect after hours and days and weeks of trying and learning and studying. He can feel it pulse, feel it become one with the forest. 

The screams are loud and blood is tainting his vision. Stiles knows it’s an illusion but he still reaches and wipes it off. His hand comes clean and he’s not surprised (just tired). 

“Time for the show” he whispers and reaches for the knife. He slices his hand open and watches as the blood falls down. It’s not much but he’s already connected to the earth so it’s enough. It’s just a formality. 

He closes his eyes and wishes – wishes with all his being; and the world wishes with him. He can feel it all. Stiles lets the words – both his and Nemeton’s – to pour from his mouth as he slams his hands down. And the night is bright as day (he’s not sure it should have happened). 

“Stiles” it’s a soft voice, gentle voice that he missed. He opens his eyes and cries. 

Allison stands before him, dressed in gold and with a bow in her hand.

“Stiles, don’t cry” she smiles at him. “I thought that Scott is the soft one” she reaches for him and he catches her outstretched hands. He pulls her close and she lets him. “Come on, Stiles. It’s not like you to cry”

“I’m sorry” Stiles’ voice is broken. Allison tightens her grip on him. She could suffocate him and he wouldn’t care (now – later he would regret it so much). But that's Allison - the real one who hated when Stiles called her Allie but still let him and the same Allison that couldn't love Scott more even if she wanted to. “I’m so sorry”

“Don’t be” she says. Her voice is light but it holds the power of the Argent Matriarch. She’s still the Queen of her clan. “No-one blames you. It wasn’t your fault”

“It was!” he screams, pulling away. He looks at his bloodied hands. “I killed them. I killed them all. I can hear them scream” he looks up at Allison. “It’s my fault you’re dead”

“Don’t be so dramatic” she snorts and Stiles remembers how Scott described it as cute. He always thought it funny. Now he’s just thankful. “The world doesn’t spin around you, Stiles”

“No, it doesn’t” he agrees. His blood is singing with the wind. “Because it spins with me”

“Oh, Stiles” her eyes are soft but she’s careful. Ready to strike and to attack. She’s the Cobra and the Huntress. Nothing will change that. “What did you do?”

“I… I’m selfish” he says. Allison watches him silently. It makes him uncomfortable, like always. “I wanted my hands to be clean”

“They were clean” Allison scolds him. She narrows her eyes. “It was the Nogitsune and Onis who killed me!”

“But I see it all!” Stiles screams. Allison seems taken aback. “I see them pierced and slashed. I hear them scream and see them run away… I’m selfish, Allie”

“Don’t call me Allie” she replies easily like nothing happened. Like he wasn’t possessed and she didn’t die. It feels normal and Stiles chokes on his tears. “You’re selfish. But… but you’re the good guy”

“Your dad needs you” Stiles whispers and Allison stiffens. 

“Your needs you too” she replies and Stiles nods. 

“I know. That’s why I’m coming back to him” Allison doesn’t say anything and he continues. “And I’m taking you all with me”

“You can’t!” Allison shouts and he feels she’s afraid. For him. “You can’t Stiles, it doesn’t work like that!”

“But it does” he says. “The Nemeton is helping me. It’s going to be fine”

Allison shakes her head and tears roll down her cheeks. 

“It all started with the Nemeton. We can’t go through this again!”

“I can’t live with all this dead people in my head!” he shouts. “For the last three months, the only thing that kept me alive was the thought of my redemption. Of making it alright. Of bringing you back!”

“Stiles…”

“I wanted to die, Allie” he says softly. “I’m not strong enough”

Allison laughs.

“Look around you” she says. He does and there are the people who died in the hospital. Who were killed by the Nogitsune. Stiles’ heart hurts because he doesn’t see Erica and Boyd. He hoped… But maybe _that_ was too much to ask. “You are strong. Look what you can do”

“It’s not the end” he argues.

“It never is” Allison replies. “Not in this world. And someone will always die”

“But not like this. Never like this” Stiles says and Allison smiles at him.

“You think that Scott is the good one. But you are just as good, Stiles”

He doesn’t want to argue with her. He knows it’s not true (and she knows it too – she has to, they are connected by his blood in the Nemeton’s roots). 

“Let’s go home, Stiles” Allison says and offers her hand.

Stiles takes it and the day turns into night again.

 

“Stiles!” 

His eyes are heavy and his mouth is dry. He can feel the forest in his blood. 

“You’re awake!”

His eyes are open and he’s in a hospital and Scott’s happy face (a bit too pale and too old) appears in front of him. He pushes him away and Scott complies, even if Stiles doesn’t have enough energy to really move him. 

Scott helps him sit up and then hugs him tightly, like he wants to crush all Stiles’ bones. 

“Thank you” he says and pulls away. Then he slaps him and Stiles’ cheek burns. “Never do anything so stupid again”

There’s a commotion and suddenly his room is full of people. His dad is looking at him with so many emotions that Stiles has to look away. 

“I’m sorry” Stiles says. His dad wounds his arms around him and pulls him close. “But I’m not sorry” he whispers in John’s shirt and the Sheriff laughs through unshed tears. 

Then he can see Chris and the man falls to his knees by Stiles’ bed. Stiles looks around, afraid and confused. No-one seems surprised.

“Thank you. Thank you. Thank you” Chris mumbles and there’s Allison by his side – happy and healthy and alive Allie – and Stiles understands. She places a kiss on his forehead (and Stiles can feel her heartbeat in his chest) and helps her father up. They leave and Isaac trails after them, giving Stiles a nod. It means a lot.

Derek looks at him like he can’t understand. He opens his mouth and closes it. 

“It’s fine” Stiles tells him and smiles – really smiles - and how wonderful it feels. Derek turns around and walks away. He stops by the door where Peter’s standing and watching. 

Peter smirks at Stiles and he grins back. It looks like they share a secret and he can feel the others are uncomfortable. Derek scowls and pulls Peter by the shirt. 

It feels so normal.

 

It takes a few hours before he sees Melissa. She kisses his forehead – where Allie kissed him – and smiles against his skin.

“Thank you” she says. “I’m proud of you” she adds. She grabs John’s hand and he kisses her fingers. And they let Stiles watch because they doesn’t want to wait anymore.

“I volunteer Scott as the Flower Girl” Stiles says and Scott protests loudly. They laugh.

It feels so normal.

 

Lydia comes when everyone else are gone. She looks like a woman on the mission and Stiles admires her and her beauty. 

“I’m sorry” she says and he frowns. 

“What for?”

“I should’ve helped you” Lydia says and then glares at him. “And you should’ve let me”

“I’m sorry” this time he says it. “It was for the best”

“I doubt it” Lydia says. She looks at him, thinking, and Stiles isn’t sure he want to hear this. “Let’s be friends”

Stiles laughs.

“Sure. Yeah” he smiles at her. She seems affronted. “But I’m still gonna love you”

“Then do. Who can blame you?” Lydia smirks and leaves shortly after.

It hurts but it’s going to be fine.

 

Nemeton is whispering in his head, talking about past and nature and it’s sharing secrets, when Deaton comes in. 

Scott and John look at him surprised and Deaton gives them a polite nod of acknowledgement. He sits by Stiles and watches him. Everyone’s doing it lately.

“It’s speaking to me” Stiles says finally and breathes out, when the Nemeton doesn’t scream.

“I know” Deaton says. He’s as mysterious as ever. “You can’t leave Beacon Hills now”

“I know” Stiles says and hears Scott gasp. He always wanted to travel the world – fulfill his mother’s dream. “But it’s going to be fine”

He doesn’t have to see the world, when it’s singing in his blood and beats in his chest.

It’s not normal. And maybe not for the best. It’s not the end and they’re gonna fight again.

But he can live with that.

**Author's Note:**

> So, I watched exactly 0 episodes of this season. Things may not make sense.  
> Oh, and I recommend 'Bad Moon Rising' to listen to! :)


End file.
